


Too Late

by Chloe_Hallow_Eve



Series: Black Paladin Lance [20]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Grief/Mourning, Minor Character Death, Pidge (Voltron)-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-05
Updated: 2017-06-05
Packaged: 2018-11-09 05:25:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11097819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chloe_Hallow_Eve/pseuds/Chloe_Hallow_Eve
Summary: Pidge finds their father.





	Too Late

Pidge didn't know how they got back to their room. But here they were, staring at the door they probably just closed behind them, numbness slowly trickling out of their brain.

 

_“What did you find? Was my dad there? He should have been, Matt secured the location himself.”_

 

They turned to their room. It was dark, save for a few screens that illuminated all of the wiring scattered across their floor. Pidge picked their way though them, only getting caught twice.

 

_“Pidge, I… I found- it's not him, but there were rumors, so I checked the files and… and I found- … I'm so sorry, Pidge.”_

 

They found themselves staring at the main screen they had been working with. Codes and locators took up the surface. All that work, and it had been Matt and his group of rebel forces to find the last place dad was. Pidge hadn't even been able to use it to find Matt. It was junk now. What was a code with no purpose?

 

_“No. No, don't you dare-”_

 

What was Pidge with no family to find?

 

_“We were too late.”_

 

The screen went flying across the room and smashing into the wall before Pidge could process their own movement. The computer slammed into the surface, bits of plastic and metal chipping off. The screen cracked, spiderwebs refracting across it. Pidge let out a guttural cry, storming over and throwing the computer back the direction it came from. It collided with one of the other computers, sending them both tumbling off of the desk. Pidge screamed again, snatching up some of the cables on the ground and yanking them out of their homes. When that wasn't enough, they took out their bayard and began hacking at the cords.

 

They hadn't just been too late. They had been _just_ too late. By a couple of days. If they had gone just a little sooner, they would have saved him.

 

The pain that was finally being released made room for the old stuff Pidge had been suppressing. The blood on their hands when they performed surgery on Lance. The explosions of the battles they lost. Watching Lance get his heart ripped out. Having Shiro disappear. When Allura had accidentally hit them with her magic. Haggar’s voice, the voice of hopelessness, ringing in their mind.

 

Battleships, friend and foe, falling from the sky. Ducking and hiding from enemy fire, terrified any of them could hit you. Quieting the cries of prisoners their trying to help who think every breath will be their last. Thinking every breath you take will be your last. Completing missions no fourteen year old - or was Pidge fifteen now - should have to do. Just wanting to go home and have their mother hug them and tell them they did good.

 

By the time Pidge was able to think again, their room was destroyed. Bits and pieces of electronics scattered, wires that were still attached to a source of electricity sparking, the lights from the screens flickering and going out. Pidge was left standing in the product of their destruction. Pidge was left alone, without the usual comfort of humming machines.

 

Pidge sniffed, taking their sleeve and wiping their face. They hobbled over to the lightswitch and hit it, wincing when the room became unexpectedly bright. They groaned and looked around the room, shielding their eyes.

 

Yep, it was a mess. Pidge sighed. They needed to go find something to clean this up. They opened the door and stepped out of their room, glancing down the hallway. No one was there. Pidge released a relieved breath. They really didn’t want to explain what they were doing.  

 

Barefoot, they padded down the hallway. The room with a broom-like thing (it was more like a vacuum broom where each bristle tore and vacuumed up anything it came in contact with while on. It really should be used as a weapon, but when Pidge brought that up, both Alteans looked appalled about using such an inefficient tool as a weapon) was just down the hall.

 

“How are those things not more deadly than our bayards?” Pidge muttered, turning the corner and tapping the pad to open the door.

 

“Hey, Pidge.”

 

Pidge jumped, snapping their head over to Hunk, who stood right behind them. “Quiznak, how do you do that?”

 

Hunk grinned, but it fell after he peered closely at Pidge’s face. “Hey, are you okay?”

 

Pidge shrugged.

 

Hunk sighed. “Right, stupid question. You’re obviously not. Sorry.”

 

Pidge shrugged again, stepping into the room. Hunk followed. Pidge crossed the floor and grabbed one of the brooms leaning on the wall.

 

“So, what are you doing?”

 

“Getting a broom.”

 

“Yeah, I can see that. What are you going to do with it?”

 

“Clean my room.”

 

“Okay,” Hunk blocked their path back to the door, placing his hands on their shoulders, “talk to me.”

 

Pidge knew looking up was a bad idea. They’d meet Hunk’s wide, earnest eyes, and everything would come bubbling up. They’d start crying again. They might even have another full break down. And yet, they instinctively raised their gaze.

 

“My dad’s dead.”

 

Pidge choked on their breath. They had been avoiding saying it out loud. That’d make it real. It made it real. It was real.

 

The hands on Pidge’s shoulders pulled them into a hug. Pidge sniffed, blinking back tears. “I’m okay. Thanks for the hug, but I’m okay.”

 

Hunk put his chin on their head. “I know. You’re strong. Just seemed like you needed one.”

 

Pidge laughed wetly, pushing against Hunk’s stomach lightly so he’d back away a bit. “Thanks. But right now, all I need is this,” Pidge waved the device in their hand around, “so called broom. I kind of... made a mess of my room.”

 

Hunk offered them a smile. “Okay. You know you can come talk to me whenever, though, right? Even if you just want cooking advice. Or food. I can give you food and cuddles. Oh, do you want a song? I’m really good at multitasking, so I could cook and be a Disney Princess at the same time.”

 

“Calm down, Hunk. I’ll come to you if I need it. Thank you.”

 

Hunk gave them a firm pat on the shoulder, lead them out of the room, then waved as he walked the opposite way down the hall. Pidge walked back to their room.

 

“Okay,” they breathed, “I’m okay.”

 

* * *

 

Pidge should have known that wouldn’t be the end of it.

 

Two days later, Pidge was sitting at the controls, trying to find some reason for how Haggar was able to drain a planet of its quintessence without a large mechanism. Or did she have a large mechanism? It was hard to tell from the angle of the camera.

 

“Fuck.” They muttered, fingers smacking the keys with more force. There was nothing. At least, nothing useful. Haggar left her trail worryingly empty. There wasn’t even a trail to follow. Pidge dropped their face into their hands. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuuuuuuuuuck.”

 

This was useless. It was all useless. Pidge couldn’t do anything to help. At least, not in this way.

 

“Shit, alright. Try something else. You’ll find it PIdge, you’ve always found it.”

 

_You didn’t find your father._

 

Pidge pressed their palms into their eyes. “No. No, we’re not doing this.”

 

_You didn’t save him._

 

“This is completely uncalled for!”

 

_You were too late._

 

Pidge dropped their hands, crossing their arms and dropping their head. They couldn’t stop their tears. At least this breakdown wasn’t explosive.

 

“Pidge?”

 

Pidge sniffed, trying to dry their face. It didn’t work so well when it kept dampening again, but it was an effort. Allura’s distinctive voice drifted closer.

 

“Oh, Pidge, this is about what happened, isn’t it?”

 

“What else would it be?” Pidge snapped, then winced. “Sorry. I didn’t… sorry.”

 

“It’s alright.” Allura placed a hand on their shoulder. “You’re upset. I understand.”

 

She really did, Pidge realised. Probably the only one who did. Pidge looked up at the princess, giving up on stopping their tears.

 

“How do you,” Pidge hiccuped, “how do you deal with it?”

 

Allura’s face twisted, an empathetic pain rising in her eyes. “It is difficult. It is the most difficult thing I’ve had to do in my life. The pain never really goes away or reduces.” She knelt, looking out at the stars. “But I remember the good things. And I cherish and am thankful for the time I got. And I tell myself that there was nothing I could have done.”

 

Pidge followed Allura’s gaze. “Do you ever believe it?”

 

Allura was silent for a long time. The hand on Pidge’s shoulder squeezed. “No. But I hope it will, one day.”

 

They had a moment of peace and silence, a moment where they shared their pain, where they could feel the other there and draw comfort in that, before the console started beeping. Pidge lurched forward, hands flying over the keys.

 

“I found it.” They breathed. “I found out how Haggar was able to get that planets quintessence.”

 

“I’ll go get the others, and then you can explain.” Allura rised, rushing from the room.

 

PIdge grinned at their codes, reaching out and patting the console. “Thank you.”

 

They could still do something right. They could still do something to help.

**Author's Note:**

> Heya guys! Thank you all for being so patient with my break. I'm glad you guys stuck around for this new addition to the series. 
> 
> Unfortunately, I'm graduating from High School this month, so I won't be able to jump right back into my old schedule. I'll try to update before summer begins, but no promises. I'll also be going back to my once-a-week schedule of updating Sunday's. The Sunday and Wednesday one was too much pressure and I couldn't keep up with it. Thank you for understanding. 
> 
> The big battles need a lot of planning, so those won't come out for a while. I'm thankful for each and every one of you, and couldn't have made it this far without your support. Thank you so, so much. You're all amazing!
> 
> I'll see you next update~!!!


End file.
